Tag: setting healthy boundaries

Being Fit Versus “Looking” Fit

Being Fit Versus "Looking" Fit - by Jennifer Ledford - Certified Personal Trainer and Lifestyle Coach

For years, the fitness and diet industry has used fitness models in their advertising to sell you the notion that if you achieve this “type” of body, you will be healthy and happy.  Unfortunately, many of the programs  promoted by the diet and fitness industry have produced the opposite effect for people.  Dieting and overtraining has done more harm than good and left people unhappy and dissatisfied.

There was a period in my life when I had  shrunk down to a size zero and became obsessed with being skinny and having a perfectly flat abdomen.  People were impressed with my tiny yet muscular physique and I was constantly complimented for it.  Life was good!  Until I crashed.

I became depressed, my body was in pain, and my hormonal system was going haywire.  It turns out that I had been overtraining and God didn’t design me to be a size zero.   The road to recovery physically was a combination of light exercise (twenty minute walks with my dogs) combined with proper rest, and a much more balanced diet that included way more fat than I had been consuming.

Fortunately, I completely recovered and times are changing.  The public is becoming more and more aware of focusing on health rather than forcing their bodies to become something they were never designed to be and we now have more models that support that concept.  People are rejecting the idea that they have to diet or beat their bodies to a pulp to be healthy.

Now that we are taking these important steps as a society to focus on health rather than dieting and overtraining, I believe it’s important for me as a personal trainer to help you learn  what focusing on being fit  looks like.

It’s important that I be completely up front with you.  Focusing on  your health is extremely personal and looks different for each individual.  We are all on our own personal journey.  For one person, focusing on health may be cutting their soda intake in half to stabilize their blood sugar and for another it could be walking their dog everyday for stress relief.

Being fit is about being able to do the things you need to do, want to do (i.e the things that bring you joy), and have to do in the event of an emergency.  It’s about getting good checkups at the doctor’s office and enjoying quality of life.  None of that has anything to do with the size of your jeans.

When it comes to overall health and fitness, balance is key.  If one area is neglected, your alignment can be off which leads to a bumpy ride.  Here are five major components that contribute to your overall health and well-being:

  1. Mentally fit.  Mental health is just as important as physical health.  Minimizing unnecessary stress in your life and talking time out to rest and restore are just as important for your mind and body as strengthening your muscles and eating leafy greens.  When your mind is strong and your body is recharged, you are able to push through challenging moments and seasons in your life.
  2. Nutritionally fit.  I personally believe it’s a good idea to eat as many whole foods as possible and to limit refined and heavily processed food in our diets.  Eating whole foods can help contribute to better energy.  With that being said, it’s also important to enjoy your food and not get too rigid about everything we eat.  Overly religious behavior around food can lead to dieting which can lead to stress and heartache which does not support mental health in a positive way.  Find balance in your life when it comes to diet and allow yourself to enjoy the foods you like.
  3. Physically fit.  Part of being physically fit is being able to perform your daily responsibilities, live a life that is fun, and being able to handle, God forbid, a crisis.  Physical fitness is generally  made up of three types of fitness.  Cardiovascular (aerobic) endurance, muscle strength, and flexibility.  Depending on your life’s demands, suggested programs will differ.  A sample program would be walking most days of the week, strength training with appropriate resistance two to three times per week, and performing stretches and self massage most days of the week.  It’s a good idea to choose exercise that focuses on function and not just “looks.”  One of the reasons I like exercising outdoors is that it can contribute to functional fitness.  Stepping over logs and/or curbs is a built-in agility routine that can protect us from falls.
  4. Financially fit.  I am not an expert on finance so I learn from others when it comes to money matters.  One thing that I do know is that money issues can cause stress.  It’s important to limit debt in our lives and to make sure we build saving accounts for surprise expenses that pop up and/or retirement.  Saving generally starts with creating a budget and living within our means.  Wise financial choices are equally as important to our health as exercise.  If you’d like more information on simple money management principles, one of my favorite people to learn from is Dave Ramsey.
  5. Environmental health.  This is a big one.  It’s important for us to be at peace where we live, work, and play.  Things like nurturing relationships, setting healthy boundaries, removing clutter from your home or life, planning family meals, taking time off to visit places that make you feel happy and restored, or spending time with your pets without your phone in hand are all examples of working  toward creating a healthy environment.  Sometimes creating a healthy environment for yourself requires changes.  My husband and I decided to move back to the area I grew up in to be closer to family and to live a simpler lifestyle.  This is an environmental change that will contribute to our overall health and well-being in a positive way.

A Fit and Healthy Lifestyle

Whether you’ve been working on these five components for awhile now or are just getting started, it’s important to remember to work at a pace that is doable for you.  We are all on our own journey and there is no need to compare your progress to anyone else.  Focus on creating a healthy lifestyle that is all your own!

Shared with love,
Jennifer

Seven Ways To Limit Stress And Have More Peace In Your Life

Seven Ways To Limit Stress And Have More Peace In Your Life by Jennifer Ledford

Everyone feels stressed from time to time.  Whenever your body has to respond to mental and/or physical pressure, stress occurs. That means it’s pretty tough to get through a week or even a day without some type of stress coming your way.

The stress response is the body’s way of protecting you so it’s not necessarily a bad thing in moderation.  When working properly, it helps you stay focused, energetic, and alert. In emergency situations, stress can save your life.  

Everyone’s stress levels are going to be different.  Some people may cope with stress more effectively or recover from stressful events more quickly than others.  For example, some of us can waltz right into the DMV and take our driving test without feeling stressed while others will be sweating bullets.

There are different types of stress.  A stressor may be a one-time event or a short-term circumstance or it can be a situation that continues for a long period of time.

Fortunately, the human body is beautifully designed to experience stress and react to it. However, when a person faces continuous challenges without relief or relaxation, the person almost always becomes overworked and chronic stress-related tension can occur.

Chronic stress can cause a variety of symptoms and can affect your weight, your health, and your overall well-being.  I personally believe that chronic stress is as bad, if not worse, for us than smoking cigarettes so, it’s a good thing to limit the amount of stress in our lives and know how to manage it when it pops up.

Seven Ways To Manage And Avoid Stress

  • Step outdoors.  A recent review of studies published in Environmental Science & Technology that focused on “outdoor exercise” discovered that physical activity in natural areas decreases the risk of mental illness and improves one’s sense of well-being.

One way I like to relieve stress is to take our dogs for a walk.  It allows me to take a break from the environment or stressful situation and take a deep breath.  When I finish the walk, I have a fresh new perspective.

  • Forgive.  Unforgiveness can contribute to anxiety and anger which causes more stress in your life.  Forgiving others does not mean what they did was okay; it simply means you release the offense from your heart and mind so that you can move on in peace.  It’s much better to forgive the guy that cut you off on the freeway than to show up at the office ticked off with elevated blood pressure.
  • Take a vacation.  It’s important to take time off and get away from your day-to-day routine. When you go on vacation, you invest in your health and special memories that will make you smile for years to come.  If budget is an issue, I recommend day-trips like picnics at your local park or at the beach while you are saving up funds for a vacation.  My husband and I went through a period when we were really watching our spending and spent our days off at the beach.  One day at the beach did more for us to relieve stress than any expensive spa could ever do.  Find the things that work for you.  They don’t necessarily have to be pricey.
  • Take action.  Procrastination or avoiding problems  can make situations worse which can lead to additional stress.  When we take the time to discover and solve issues that are causing stress in our life, there is a sense of peace in knowing that the problem is going to be solved and that the stress is not permanent.  Sometimes we can figure out the solutions on our own.  Other times, it’s best to seek professional help for expert advice.  It’s okay and actually wise to ask for help!
  • It’s okay to say no.  Setting boundaries with your time is one of the best tools you have to limit unnecessary stress.  Write your top five to ten life priorities in order of importance. Then, look at your calendar and see how much time is being devoted to each. Is there a balance? Is there something that should be put on hold for awhile? Depending on what that list looks like currently, that may even include formal workouts and temporarily switching to lifestyle activity for your exercise.
  • Pray.  As a spiritual person this is my number one go-to when it comes to managing stress.  I go straight to God and pray.  This doesn’t mean I’m always on my knees praying.   Sometimes it’s a conversation in the car, out on a trail, or on our back deck. Listening to spiritual music and reading daily devotionals that lift me spirit up are helpful as well.

If prayer isn’t your thing, that’s okay.  Find some positive books, music, or affirmations that help you feel inspired and stimulated in a healthy way.

  • Remove toxic people from your life.  This one’s a biggie.  We all know that person that makes us feel bummed out or even worse “slimed” after we have been around them.  As difficult as it can be at times, it’s important for your health and well-being to limit your time with people that stress you out.  If it’s a family member or coworker, you may want to counsel with someone that can help coach you through the best way to handle your situation.

There is no such thing as a “stress-free” life.  None of us will ever completely avoid it. However, I believe that if you use one or all of the tips above, you will be able to minimize it and it will, over time, have less of an effect on you.

Here’s to less stress and more peace in your life!

Shared with love,
Jennifer

How To Feel Comfortable In Your Own Skin

How To Feel Comfortable In Your Own Skin by Jennifer Ledford

As a personal trainer and someone who has overcome my own body image issues, I am relieved and excited to watch more and more people say no to the pressures of the diet culture and yes to becoming their own best body.  Our society has begun to reject the notion that there is only one acceptable or “healthy” body type and is embracing the fact that health and beauty really does come in all shapes and sizes.  As more and more people recognize that they are uniquely designed and no two bodies are the same, the focus is shifting away from striving for perfection and more toward being healthy and positive about our bodies (flaws and all).

One of the first steps toward being positive about one’s body is self-acceptance and/or “feeling comfortable in your own skin.”  It’s important to understand that self-acceptance does not mean you just “let yourself go.”  What it means is that you will be kind to yourself and your body in every season and every stage of your life.  It means that if you do need or want to lose weight, you will choose a healthy path that can be sustained long-term and won’t force your body to become a weight that is completely unnatural for it.

Being positive about your own body doesn’t always come easy.  Most people, by nature, are compassionate and kind when it comes to how they look at other people’s bodies, but when it comes to things like our own cellulite or the extra five pounds we gained over the holidays, we can be way more critical.  Basically, humans can be downright hard on themselves.

It may seem like no big deal to speak negatively about your body; however, over time, it can start to become your identity.  This is why it’s so important to pay attention to the words that you speak when you are talking about yourself.  Do you say good things about yourself or do you tend to be over-critical?  It’s next to impossible to feel good about yourself if you are constantly bashing your body.

One of the best ways to know if you are picking on yourself too much is to ask yourself if you would ever say the things you say about your own body to your friend or your daughter.  If the answer is “no way!” then it may be time to change the conversation with and about yourself.

Five ways to stop the body bashing, Feel Comfortable In Your Own Skin, and encourage yourself:

  1. Avoid comparing yourself to others.  There is no one else like you on the planet so it is completely unfair and unrealistic to compare yourself to others.  Sure, there are similar body types, however you can place twenty people on the same exact diet and exercise routine and they will usually all have different results.  Comparison to others only causes heartache.  Focus on being the best YOU that you can be.
  2. Create healthy boundaries.  Complaining about one’s body parts has become a way that people connect with each other in social circles.  As harmless as a comment here and there might seem, this is not only bad for your self-esteem, it can completely derail you from your healthy weight loss efforts or any other goal you are trying to achieve.  If you notice that the conversation has turned into people criticizing themselves, address it head on with something like “Hey guys, no beating up on ourselves today, okay?”
  3. Hand out compliments.  Compliments are the exact opposite of bashing which is what makes compliments so powerful.  Give yourself and a minimum of one other person a sincere compliment every day for the next thirty days.  You will be AMAZED at how good it makes you feel about yourself and the trail of goodwill that you leave behind you.
  4. Be unapologetically you.  Life is way too short to spend it worrying about what other people think of you.  Focus on being healthy and living your best life.  Just say no to changing yourself for the purpose of acceptance from society, the media, and/or the diet culture.
  5. Create a folder of positive reminders.  Being positive about your body is an on going process and no matter how good you get at  rocking who you were designed to be,  negative and critical thoughts can still pop up from time to time. Just last week I was looking at some old pictures of myself and judgmental thoughts like “you used to be so skinny” began to pop up in my head.  Fortunately, I know better than to give those types of thoughts much airtime.  I quickly reminded myself “yes, I was skinnier but  I also had messed up hormones and my body was broken down.  I am so much healthier and happier now then I was back then.” Positive thoughts are like powerful weapons used for good. Come up with a long list of kind things you can say about yourself.  Then, when a critical thought pops into your head, pull something from your list to counter the negative thought.

FEELing COMFORTABLE IN YOUR OWN SKIN is powerful

One of the most powerful things that you can achieve is the ability to be comfortable in your own skin.  In a society that places way too much value on the external and not nearly enough value on the internal, it can be difficult at times.  I look forward to the day when it is more common than not for people to be comfortable in their own skin each and every day.  Until then, let’s be the bold ones that step out and lead the charge!

Shared with love,
Jennifer