Category: Stress Management

It’s Time To Stop Beating Yourself Up And Give Yourself A Break

Perfection is overrated - give yourself a break!

If you have been following me for the past few months, you may know that my husband and I recently moved with our three dogs.  We placed the majority of our belongings in PODS and downsized from a thirteen hundred square foot home to a six hundred square foot temporary rental while we sell our house.  Our temporary housing is a block and a half away from the beach so it was totally worth it to move into a “tiny” house.

I’m happy to say that the five of us are settling in to our new environment and I’m starting to get a routine down.

Moving is a major transition that can interrupt many areas of your life so I decided to be realistic about the expectations I was going to place on myself during this time.  All was going well on the “grace” front until the voices in my head showed up.  Maybe you are familiar with them.  The voices that whisper to you what you “should” be doing, or that you are failing, or a big slacker.  Yeah, those.

It’s always a good idea to write your goals down and to set dates when you’d like to see them accomplished so I had laid out everything the way I wanted life to look like by this time this month on paper.  It turns out I was being a bit ambitious even though I thought I was being realistic.  There were several things I hadn’t factored in to my day like multiple dog walks now that we don’t have a fence, organizing a “tiny” house, and traveling longer distances to run errands.

Give Yourself A Break

Fortunately, as a coach, I walk people through the process of “giving yourself a break” quite often so I was able to recognize those ugly voices in my head.  I took a step back and listened to the still small voice that was reminding me that we just moved, I’ve been managing the sale of our house, maintaining my business,  taking care of our animals without a secure fence, and figuring out where to buy groceries.  Considering what’s on my plate, things are actually going pretty well.  We only had one dog disappear for ten minutes (totally terrifying), we are eating home cooked meals, I’ve organized all our clothes, I’m still writing this blog, and we are getting outdoors everyday and enjoying this season in our life.  Turns out I’m not a slacker after all.

While most of us know that perfection is totally overrated and none of us can be at the top of our game all of the time, the voices in our head still like to show up and mess with us.  Comparison can kick in and we can run through the list of things we “should” be doing and the areas we think or maybe know we have failed in.  Beating yourself up is not just emotionally draining.  It can kill your joy, your creativity, and your productivity.

It’s important that we work hard and set goals.  It’s also important that we remind ourselves that we only have so many awake hours in the day and that different seasons will produce different results.

If you are in a transition right now or starting something new, I encourage you to walk toward your destiny with a flexible calendar and to be kind to yourself.

Here’s a short Facebook Live post I did last week to help encourage you!

Make it a great week!

Shared with love,
Jennifer

 

Being Fit Versus “Looking” Fit

Being Fit Versus "Looking" Fit - by Jennifer Ledford - Certified Personal Trainer and Lifestyle Coach

For years, the fitness and diet industry has used fitness models in their advertising to sell you the notion that if you achieve this “type” of body, you will be healthy and happy.  Unfortunately, many of the programs  promoted by the diet and fitness industry have produced the opposite effect for people.  Dieting and overtraining has done more harm than good and left people unhappy and dissatisfied.

There was a period in my life when I had  shrunk down to a size zero and became obsessed with being skinny and having a perfectly flat abdomen.  People were impressed with my tiny yet muscular physique and I was constantly complimented for it.  Life was good!  Until I crashed.

I became depressed, my body was in pain, and my hormonal system was going haywire.  It turns out that I had been overtraining and God didn’t design me to be a size zero.   The road to recovery physically was a combination of light exercise (twenty minute walks with my dogs) combined with proper rest, and a much more balanced diet that included way more fat than I had been consuming.

Fortunately, I completely recovered and times are changing.  The public is becoming more and more aware of focusing on health rather than forcing their bodies to become something they were never designed to be and we now have more models that support that concept.  People are rejecting the idea that they have to diet or beat their bodies to a pulp to be healthy.

Now that we are taking these important steps as a society to focus on health rather than dieting and overtraining, I believe it’s important for me as a personal trainer to help you learn  what focusing on being fit  looks like.

It’s important that I be completely up front with you.  Focusing on  your health is extremely personal and looks different for each individual.  We are all on our own personal journey.  For one person, focusing on health may be cutting their soda intake in half to stabilize their blood sugar and for another it could be walking their dog everyday for stress relief.

Being fit is about being able to do the things you need to do, want to do (i.e the things that bring you joy), and have to do in the event of an emergency.  It’s about getting good checkups at the doctor’s office and enjoying quality of life.  None of that has anything to do with the size of your jeans.

When it comes to overall health and fitness, balance is key.  If one area is neglected, your alignment can be off which leads to a bumpy ride.  Here are five major components that contribute to your overall health and well-being:

  1. Mentally fit.  Mental health is just as important as physical health.  Minimizing unnecessary stress in your life and talking time out to rest and restore are just as important for your mind and body as strengthening your muscles and eating leafy greens.  When your mind is strong and your body is recharged, you are able to push through challenging moments and seasons in your life.
  2. Nutritionally fit.  I personally believe it’s a good idea to eat as many whole foods as possible and to limit refined and heavily processed food in our diets.  Eating whole foods can help contribute to better energy.  With that being said, it’s also important to enjoy your food and not get too rigid about everything we eat.  Overly religious behavior around food can lead to dieting which can lead to stress and heartache which does not support mental health in a positive way.  Find balance in your life when it comes to diet and allow yourself to enjoy the foods you like.
  3. Physically fit.  Part of being physically fit is being able to perform your daily responsibilities, live a life that is fun, and being able to handle, God forbid, a crisis.  Physical fitness is generally  made up of three types of fitness.  Cardiovascular (aerobic) endurance, muscle strength, and flexibility.  Depending on your life’s demands, suggested programs will differ.  A sample program would be walking most days of the week, strength training with appropriate resistance two to three times per week, and performing stretches and self massage most days of the week.  It’s a good idea to choose exercise that focuses on function and not just “looks.”  One of the reasons I like exercising outdoors is that it can contribute to functional fitness.  Stepping over logs and/or curbs is a built-in agility routine that can protect us from falls.
  4. Financially fit.  I am not an expert on finance so I learn from others when it comes to money matters.  One thing that I do know is that money issues can cause stress.  It’s important to limit debt in our lives and to make sure we build saving accounts for surprise expenses that pop up and/or retirement.  Saving generally starts with creating a budget and living within our means.  Wise financial choices are equally as important to our health as exercise.  If you’d like more information on simple money management principles, one of my favorite people to learn from is Dave Ramsey.
  5. Environmental health.  This is a big one.  It’s important for us to be at peace where we live, work, and play.  Things like nurturing relationships, setting healthy boundaries, removing clutter from your home or life, planning family meals, taking time off to visit places that make you feel happy and restored, or spending time with your pets without your phone in hand are all examples of working  toward creating a healthy environment.  Sometimes creating a healthy environment for yourself requires changes.  My husband and I decided to move back to the area I grew up in to be closer to family and to live a simpler lifestyle.  This is an environmental change that will contribute to our overall health and well-being in a positive way.

A Fit and Healthy Lifestyle

Whether you’ve been working on these five components for awhile now or are just getting started, it’s important to remember to work at a pace that is doable for you.  We are all on our own journey and there is no need to compare your progress to anyone else.  Focus on creating a healthy lifestyle that is all your own!

Shared with love,
Jennifer

Seven Ways To Limit Stress And Have More Peace In Your Life

Seven Ways To Limit Stress And Have More Peace In Your Life by Jennifer Ledford

Everyone feels stressed from time to time.  Whenever your body has to respond to mental and/or physical pressure, stress occurs. That means it’s pretty tough to get through a week or even a day without some type of stress coming your way.

The stress response is the body’s way of protecting you so it’s not necessarily a bad thing in moderation.  When working properly, it helps you stay focused, energetic, and alert. In emergency situations, stress can save your life.  

Everyone’s stress levels are going to be different.  Some people may cope with stress more effectively or recover from stressful events more quickly than others.  For example, some of us can waltz right into the DMV and take our driving test without feeling stressed while others will be sweating bullets.

There are different types of stress.  A stressor may be a one-time event or a short-term circumstance or it can be a situation that continues for a long period of time.

Fortunately, the human body is beautifully designed to experience stress and react to it. However, when a person faces continuous challenges without relief or relaxation, the person almost always becomes overworked and chronic stress-related tension can occur.

Chronic stress can cause a variety of symptoms and can affect your weight, your health, and your overall well-being.  I personally believe that chronic stress is as bad, if not worse, for us than smoking cigarettes so, it’s a good thing to limit the amount of stress in our lives and know how to manage it when it pops up.

Seven Ways To Manage And Avoid Stress

  • Step outdoors.  A recent review of studies published in Environmental Science & Technology that focused on “outdoor exercise” discovered that physical activity in natural areas decreases the risk of mental illness and improves one’s sense of well-being.

One way I like to relieve stress is to take our dogs for a walk.  It allows me to take a break from the environment or stressful situation and take a deep breath.  When I finish the walk, I have a fresh new perspective.

  • Forgive.  Unforgiveness can contribute to anxiety and anger which causes more stress in your life.  Forgiving others does not mean what they did was okay; it simply means you release the offense from your heart and mind so that you can move on in peace.  It’s much better to forgive the guy that cut you off on the freeway than to show up at the office ticked off with elevated blood pressure.
  • Take a vacation.  It’s important to take time off and get away from your day-to-day routine. When you go on vacation, you invest in your health and special memories that will make you smile for years to come.  If budget is an issue, I recommend day-trips like picnics at your local park or at the beach while you are saving up funds for a vacation.  My husband and I went through a period when we were really watching our spending and spent our days off at the beach.  One day at the beach did more for us to relieve stress than any expensive spa could ever do.  Find the things that work for you.  They don’t necessarily have to be pricey.
  • Take action.  Procrastination or avoiding problems  can make situations worse which can lead to additional stress.  When we take the time to discover and solve issues that are causing stress in our life, there is a sense of peace in knowing that the problem is going to be solved and that the stress is not permanent.  Sometimes we can figure out the solutions on our own.  Other times, it’s best to seek professional help for expert advice.  It’s okay and actually wise to ask for help!
  • It’s okay to say no.  Setting boundaries with your time is one of the best tools you have to limit unnecessary stress.  Write your top five to ten life priorities in order of importance. Then, look at your calendar and see how much time is being devoted to each. Is there a balance? Is there something that should be put on hold for awhile? Depending on what that list looks like currently, that may even include formal workouts and temporarily switching to lifestyle activity for your exercise.
  • Pray.  As a spiritual person this is my number one go-to when it comes to managing stress.  I go straight to God and pray.  This doesn’t mean I’m always on my knees praying.   Sometimes it’s a conversation in the car, out on a trail, or on our back deck. Listening to spiritual music and reading daily devotionals that lift me spirit up are helpful as well.

If prayer isn’t your thing, that’s okay.  Find some positive books, music, or affirmations that help you feel inspired and stimulated in a healthy way.

  • Remove toxic people from your life.  This one’s a biggie.  We all know that person that makes us feel bummed out or even worse “slimed” after we have been around them.  As difficult as it can be at times, it’s important for your health and well-being to limit your time with people that stress you out.  If it’s a family member or coworker, you may want to counsel with someone that can help coach you through the best way to handle your situation.

There is no such thing as a “stress-free” life.  None of us will ever completely avoid it. However, I believe that if you use one or all of the tips above, you will be able to minimize it and it will, over time, have less of an effect on you.

Here’s to less stress and more peace in your life!

Shared with love,
Jennifer