Category: Personal growth

How To Handle A Setback And Keep Moving Forward

How To Handle A Major Setback In Your Life by Certified Personal Trainer and Healthy Lifestyle Coach Jennifer Ledford

Life can be unpredictable at times.  We live in a less than perfect world which means we will all have to deal with some kind of trial or setback at some point and time.  Some trials just happen to be more difficult than others.

Last week I stepped on some uneven sidewalk walking home from a restaurant. One minute I was walking and holding my husband’s hand, the next minute I was on the ground writhing in pain.  I tried putting weight on it and was able to for a small amount of time but after awhile it became obvious I was not able to put any weight on it all.  The emergency room confirmed that my foot was indeed broken, put a splint on it, and referred me out to an orthopedic surgeon.

Over the years, my job as a personal trainer has allowed me to help more people than I can count recover from injuries.  I have had the opportunity to work under the direction of the specialists and the physical therapists.  My career has allowed me to learn quite a bit about the rehabilitation process so, when the doctors were explaining my injury, I had a pretty good idea of what I was facing.  This personal trainer, business owner, wife, home maker, and dog mom was not going to be able to put weight on her foot for several weeks.  Ugh!  Almost everything I do requires that I’m on my feet.

Fortunately, my husband is totally stepping up to the plate, we were able to get some help with the dogs right away, and we’ve had wonderful friends volunteer to help.  However, after about five days of trying to get around without putting weight on my left foot, I began to feel overwhelmed, frustrated, and even a bit depressed.  The truth is this is a major interruption that is affecting many areas of my life.

Fortunately, as tempted as I was to feel sorry for myself and slip into pity party mode, I DID NOT allow myself to go there.  I admitted to myself and God that I was struggling and then took action steps to turn my mindset around and focus on what I can do rather than what I can’t do right now.

How To Handle A Setback In Any Area Of Your Life

In today’s video I share tips on how to handle a setback in any area of your life and continue moving forward toward your goals.  We can’t always control our circumstances in life.  We can, however, always control how we respond to them.

Enjoy the video.  I shot it right after a hair appointment so credit for the hair goes to John Ryan at Festoon salon.  🙂  And, if you think this video could bless someone else, please feel free to share it!

Make it a great week!

With Love,
Jennifer Ledford

Book mentioned in the video: Failing Forward

 

The Most Common Regret For Older Americans And How You Can Avoid It

shutterstock_370418675 - The Most Common Regret

My ninety two year old grandfather passed on last week.  We will miss him dearly.  It’s always sad to lose a loved one; however, there is something slightly comforting about the fact that he lived to be ninety two years of age.

His passing does have me wondering if, in his mind, his life was a full one.  This question prompted me to do a little research on the most common regrets of the elderly.  Based on the life expectancy in this nation, the majority of us will live well into our golden years.  Personally, I would like to make the most of my time here on earth and I’m guessing you would too so even if the senior discount seems a long ways away from now, I believe you will be interested in what I discovered.

The Most Common REGRET OF THE ELDERLY

In 2004, a Cornell University professor by the name of Karl Pillemer launched The Legacy Project.  Fifteen hundred Americans over the age of sixty five were asked about the most important lessons they learned over the course of their lives.  Apparently Professor Pillemer was not prepared for the answer.  He expected “big” regrets like addictions, affairs, bad business decisions, etc.  Nope, it turns out that the most common regret was worrying too much.  

After reading multiple lists of the top regrets of the elderly, I’m not surprised that worry came in at number one because it tends to be the root of many of the other common regrets this age group shares.

Here are some of the other regrets I discovered:

  • wishing they hadn’t cared so much about what others thought
  • been happier
  • pursued the career they dreamed of instead of what their parents wanted for them
  • working too much
  • playing it too safe
  • passing up on the “dream job”
  • never asking her or him out on a date

All of the regrets above can be tied to fear of the unknown, otherwise known as worry.

According to scientists who study worry, the key characteristic is that it takes place in the absence of actual or real stressors.  In other words, most worrying occurs when there is nothing concrete or “real” to worry about.

How To Reduce Regret

To reduce the number of regrets in our lives experts recommend spending more time on problem solving and less time worrying.  Another way to look at it is to focus on the solution rather than the problem.  For example, if you are worried about money, then start a savings account and create a realistic budget that helps you to build up wealth.  Focus on the solution rather than the problem.

Or, if you are worried about what others think of you, ask yourself why you care.  If it’s your boss and you want to improve your performance, continue to sharpen your skills and be the employee you would want to hire.  If you are worried about something like how you look in a bathing suit, remind yourself that most people are more worried about how they look in their own bathing suit and focus on enjoying yourself and the environment around you.  Be the empowering example that sets others free at the beach. 🙂

It’s also important to remember not to worry about things we can’t control.  I can’t make anyone like me.  However, I can continue to work on my people skills and do my best to be someone that others like to be around.  Not everyone that walks this earth is going to like me so as long as I know I’m giving it my best shot, I can’t worry about pleasing everyone.

Worrying does more than just steal your joy.  It’s hard on your health and can keep you from walking toward your destiny.

Fortunately, problem solving has the opposite effect of worry.  Focusing on solutions will empower you, relieve stress, and help you move forward toward success.

One of the most valuable things a seasoned or elderly person can share is their wisdom and experience.  Let’s learn from their regrets and do our best to have less of our own when we’re asked the same question at their age.

Shared with love,
Jennifer Ledford

 

Why I’m No Longer Interested In Being A Size Two

Jennifer Ledford Photo Shoot 2016 - Ledford0416-7591 - self image

We’ve recently been working on updating the photos for my website.  The photo above is a sneak peek of some of the lifestyle photos we’ll be sharing on it and on social media. It’s such an exciting time to be in fitness and I’m really enjoying the process of bringing personal training and coaching to the internet.

Life is interesting.  Sometimes new things can dredge up old things that you would rather leave behind.  Scheduling this recent photo shoot briefly dug up some old self image issues that I have worked hard to overcome.  I actually began to think about “dieting” for the photos.  I haven’t dieted in years!

While there is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to look toned and in shape, I knew in my  heart that if I did anything other than what I teach, the photos would not have been authentic.  I would have joined the ranks of yet another fitness professional promoting one idea on the outside while secretly living a restrictive life behind the scenes.

How To Not Allow Self Image Issues To Win

Yes, it’s true.  The self image issues that  I work so hard to help others overcome tried to rear their ugly head and bite me in the butt!  Thankfully I didn’t allow them to win.

Rather than allow myself to fall for the diet trap I used this moment to get really solid on how I want my life to look when it comes to health and fitness.  Over the years I’ve allowed myself to gain a healthy amount of weight because there was a time in my life when I was “too skinny” for my body type.  On the outside people thought I looked healthy but in reality I was doing unhealthy things to remain a size two.  Thankfully, that’s no longer the case.

I’m forty six years old.  I have no interest in trying to be twenty five again.  What I want is to look great at forty six.   At this stage of my life I’m way more interested in creating a healthy and fulfilling lifestyle than I am in being unnaturally skinny.  I’m committed to things like eating well, exercising daily, strength training three times per week, drinking liquid calories in moderation, drinking plenty of water, getting  enough sleep, laughing a lot, and creating special memories.

Please understand, I will always pay attention to my weight and if I notice the scale is going in the wrong direction I will take a look at what might be the cause and make adjustments.  However, I have also decided that I’m not going to be a slave to that one pair of jeans from ten years ago that a part of society thinks I should still be able to fit into.  There is nothing wrong with setting goals to be able to fit into your old clothes without having to do an aerobic workout to get them on, but it should never be at the cost of your physical and emotional health.

The well-known phrase “bodies come in all shapes and sizes” is not a cliche.  It’s a true statement.  When you choose to maintain a weight that’s appropriate for you and you can sustain it without deprivation or emotional heartache you are walking in freedom.  The number on the scale is personal.  There is no one size fits all when it comes to health and fitness.

I’m not suggesting you give up on vigorous exercise or paying attention to things like portion sizes and fueling your body properly.  What I’m talking about is setting manageable goals that are appropriate for the season you are currently in, your physical capabilities, and how you want to live your life.

Over the years I’ve had the opportunity to help clients achieve weight loss that is sustainable while contributing positively to their physical and emotional health.  The guidelines and formulas may be similar, however their personal eating plans and exercise routines are individually unique to them.

My desire for anyone reading this article is that you would be so comfortable and confident in your own skin that you would make health your primary focus and that weight loss would be one of the many benefits.  You’ll still have to work for it.  Our bodies were designed to move and it’s important to exercise.  It’s also important to practice self control when it comes to what we put in our bodies.

From time to time people of all shapes and sizes will experience self image issues.  That includes thin people.  Negative thoughts and relentless marketing can come at us from all directions.  The good news is just because you have a thought does not mean it’s your own.  If the negative voices start whispering “you’re not good enough” or “you’d be happier if you just looked like him or her on the cover of the magazine,” stay strong.  Remind yourself that you are in this for health, not just a photo shoot.

Maintaining a healthy self image for life is entirely doable.  In the beginning it takes practice.  Over time, the more you begin to love and accept yourself for who God designed you to be, the easier it becomes.  I encourage you to explore and discover exactly who that is.  It’s a lifelong process and it’s totally worth it.  I promise!

Here’s to a happy and healthy week!

Shared with love,
Jennifer