Taking Care Of Yourself Isn’t Selfish, It’s Necessary

Taking Care Of Yourself Isn't Selfish, It's Necessary

There was a time when I used to burn the candle at both ends and it was exhausting.  From the outside I looked like a go-getter, but on the inside I was falling apart.  I had hit the wall emotionally, mentally, and physically.   I had focused on taking care of everyone except myself.  Out of necessity, I decided to start taking better care of myself and that’s when I decided to focus on total health, wellness, and self care.

After spending some time researching the term “self care”, I’ve figured out that there are different opinions and theories as to what self care is and it’s going to be personal and different for everyone.  In general, self-care is any activity that you deliberately do to contribute to your mental, emotional, and physical health in a positive way.  While that may sound simple, self care is something that is often ignored because the only one you are accountable to is yourself, and it’s easy to break dates with ourselves.

When it comes to self care, or doing things for yourself, one of the top reasons people report putting themselves on the back burner is a feeling of guilt.  Focusing time and attention on yourself is too often considered selfish.  Unfortunately, while it might seem noble or even necessary to sacrifice taking care of your mind, body, and spirit, over time it’s a recipe for burnout.

Taking time to take care of your mind and body is good for you and it’s certainly not selfish.  In fact, research is showing us that the pursuit of health and happiness is far from selfish.   When we practice self care, we’re likely to see an improvement in many areas of our lives, including our physical health and wellness, our relationships, and even our income. Plus, by making the choice to take good care of ourselves, we open up our capacity to care for others which helps contribute positively to the world around us.  It’s much easier to give to others when you feel well taken care of.  Self care is not a luxury it’s a necessity.

here is a list of thirty eight self care ideas to help you get started

  1. Give yourself permission to say no.
  2. Do your best to step outside every day.
  3. Stop and stretch once an hour.
  4. Drink plenty of water.
  5. Get at least 7 ½ hours of sleep a night.
  6. Laugh daily.
  7. Say nice things about yourself.
  8. Listen to music.
  9. Dance.
  10. Exercise.
  11. Delegate and ask for help. 
  12. Get a manicure, pedicure, haircut, etc.
  13. Ditch the guilt and justification around doing something for yourself.
  14. Move your body in a way that feels good. 
  15. Buy a new outfit.
  16. Decorate or change up the looks of your surroundings. 
  17. Ask for what you need.
  18. Accept compliments. 
  19. Journal.
  20. Pray.
  21. Meditate.
  22. Allow yourself to have a hobby.
  23. Work on your car.
  24. Fix or build something.
  25. Buy something new for yourself.
  26. Have lunch with a friend who makes you feel good about yourself.
  27. Go on a date with your spouse or significant other.
  28. Read a book or magazine.
  29. Go to the beach.
  30. Play with your pets.
  31. Take a bath.
  32. Attend happy hour at your favorite restaurant or bar.
  33. Plan a vacation or day trip.
  34. Light a candle.
  35. Order takeout.
  36. Get a babysitter.
  37. Browse antique shops and thrift stores.
  38. Hang out at the book store.

Because self care is so personal, I encourage you to make a list of your own ideas that you can pull from weekly or even daily.  For example, some people might list “go to the gym” as self care while others would prefer a “stroll on a beach.”  Self care should not have stress attached to it.  The whole point of self care is that you look forward to whatever you choose, it recharges you, and it lowers stress.

Here’s to taking care of yourself and living a long and happy life!

Shared with love,


Four Simple Exercises To Help You Move More And Sit Less

Statistics are showing that most U.S. adults are sitting anywhere between nine and twelve hours daily. For many people, activities like commuting, working, shuttling kids, taking classes, or taking care of personal “stuff” are all contributing to their sitting time.  All of these tasks  are important, making it difficult to avoid the amount of sitting that is involved.

Research continues to show us that there are health risks associated with sitting for long periods of time on a daily basis.  If you know your day requires a lot of sitting, there are simple things you can do to lower the risks involved with being sedentary.  For example, taking short breaks to stand up and move can benefit you greatly.

In the short video below, I demonstrate four simple exercises that can help you move more and sit less. They are easy to weave into your day and you can do them almost anywhere.

Here’s to moving more and sitting less.  Every little bit counts!

Shared with love,


5 Ways To Create Healthy Habits That Stick

How To Create Healthy Habits That Stick

Habits – some serve you well while others can keep you from meeting your goals and reaching your full potential.

Based on my own personal experience and twenty eight years of experience coaching others,  I’ve learned that it is much easier to create new habits than to focus on getting rid of old ones.  We tend to get more of what we focus on so it’s always best to focus on the things that will take us to where we want to go.  The stronger the new healthy habit becomes, the less room you will have in your life for the old habit you’d like to see go away.  What you feed will flourish, and what you ignore will usually fade away.

A habit is defined as a behavior pattern acquired by frequent repetition. One of the top reasons people fail to stick to a new healthy habit is lack of consistency.  In the past, this lack of consistency was often blamed on a lack of willpower.  This type of finger pointing has been an unfair judgement and/or assumption.  While self-control and discipline certainly play a part in creating healthy habits, depending on “willpower” alone is a recipe for failure.

How to create healthy habits that stick

  1. Be specific.  When we set general goals like “getting healthy” it can seem vague and overwhelming.  Take a moment to ask yourself what your end goal actually means to you and then  decide on 1-2 specific actions you know you can implement right away.  For example, if you want to eat out less, you can start by bringing your lunch to work for the next thirty days. Or, if you want to be more active,  you can walk your dog every day before you turn on the TV.
  2. Honor yourself.  It’s important to know how you are wired to avoid setting unrealistic goals for yourself.  If you know you are not a morning person then you probably want to steer clear of the 6 a.m. boot camp class and exercise later in the day.  Take a moment to look at past successes for clues of what works for you and what doesn’t.  Stay true to yourself and learn to say no to the things that aren’t right for you no matter how enticing the marketing makes it sound.
  3. Give yourself a break.   Priorities and/or obstacles can pop up that interrupt your day.  While I always recommend planning for and expecting success, life doesn’t always go as planned.  If you find yourself in the drive through or skipping a workout, don’t beat yourself up about it.  Guilt can distract you from your goals.  Forget about it and get back on track toward your goals.  Success is about being flexible and figuring out what works, not being perfect.
  4. Attach your new habit to one that is already established.  Research suggests that when we attach a new habit to one that is already established we are more likely to stick to it.  For example, if you want to drink more water, tell yourself you will drink a glass of water right after you brush your teeth in the morning and with every meal.  It’s important for me to stretch daily so I do my stretches after dinner while I’m having a cup of tea or a glass of wine.  I’ve attached my stretching to the habit of eating dinner every night.
  5. Keep it fun.  None of us are looking for a long list of new chores.  While it’s true that any good habit worth working for is going to require effort and you will have to push through resistance at times, you should also be enjoying yourself and reaping rewards.  For example, if you’ve committed to eating healthy and cooking more often, make sure you are choosing foods and recipes that taste good to you.  Or, if you want to exercise more, choose activities that make you feel good and fit into your schedule.  Good habits should not be causing stress in your life.

STay In The Game

It’s a good idea to remember that anyone that has a pulse has a habit or two they would like to change.  Be kind to yourself and remember that this is your own personal journey.  You may not be where you want to be yet. However, you are further than you were yesterday.  Stay in the game and you WILL come out a winner!

Here’s to a lifetime a healthy habits!

With love,